@kristinkelly@nerdculture.de Great question! It can be rough at the start, for sure!
When I was new, I had a friend who had been on Mastodon for a long time, and I asked her how she navigated, and she explained why I ought to leave mastodon.social. When I moved, it was like the world opened up! I was able to see so much more of the Fediverse, and began making more friends.
When I look at new instances, I'm looking to see:
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What are their guidelines?
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Do they have moderation objectives in place, and do they seem to have a plan for dealing with folks who go against the guidelines?
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Is it one person running a large instance alone, or is it a team that helps each other?
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Also, feel free to ask! You can say, "I'm thinking of joining this instance, have folks heard anything about this place?"
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If you know of an instance you do like and trust, many times those instances will have lists in their About section on which servers they avoid. Those lists can be illuminating!