For everyone else terminally annoyed by sportsball grand finals, here's David Mitchell representing my feelings. Different sport, but that hardly matters.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MusyO7J2inM
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Mark Asser
@MarkAsser@beige.party
mastodon 4.7.3Idle. Sometimes bone-idle. Trying to write fiction, intermittently. Also (still) trying to find the right chap. Easily distracted. I'm in South Australia, by the way. Sealions muted on sight.
1089 Followers
1152 Following
50 Posts
Joined May 04, 2023
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@sisterratched@social.vivaldi.net I get my fibre from brown rice, wholegrain bread, etc. No holes in the wall yet.
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@caity@bne.social I have no fixed connection at all. Just a mobile phone hotspot...
@sisterratched@social.vivaldi.net
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@sisterratched@social.vivaldi.net My explanation that I was planning to live here for three or four decades met with the blankest of uncomprehending looks.
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@sisterratched@social.vivaldi.net It's also fun to tell estate agents that I don't care what the place is worth. They have existential crises, you can see it in their eyes.
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@sisterratched@social.vivaldi.net When I had this place built, the builders would only offer me grey tiles. I had to fight to get something as colourful as beige on the walls, and fight some more to get the doorframes, skirting boards etc in not-beige.
I'm trying to save up for paint to do it all properly myself.
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I have now been told that confronting a new and very confronting reality requires bananas. I shall depart forthwith for the banana shop. Something to do, I guess.
Surely a positive sign for Count Binface.
https://www.theguardian.com/world/2026/aug/04/white-elephant-colombia-anti-corruption-activist-senator-luis-carlos-rua
My last (?) comment on today's AusAlert national awful noise day...
The alert text basically says "This is where we'll be telling you about dreadful apocalyptic disasters that threaten your existence", and under that there's a button that says "OK".
Major bushfire heading straight for you? OK.
Terrorist outrage down the pub? OK.
Imminent molecular destruction? OK.
I think the button which clears away the warning should be rebadged from "OK" to "Fuck".
Payday! Let's go wild! I shall buy lentils.
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Bananas acquired. I'll take them for a bus ride later.
Council's dug even more tree holes. I approve of this.
Yesterday's pothole is still there. Someone's helped matters by removing the traffic cone, which I'm sure is tremendously helpful.
"Content creator"? Yeah, nah. Be a discontent creator. Much more interesting.
I must stop buying all of this sugary crap [he typed with chocolatey fingers after brushing the crumbs from his mouth and shirt and lap] and the only way for me to manage that is, I think, to give up caffeine. I buy the sugary crap when seeking out the (sugarless) caffeine... So here's the plan. Consume the caffeine that's already in the house, then switch to a daily caffeine pill to prevent withdrawal headaches. After a week or two, I'll decrease the dose. It's the only way. My pancreas will eventually thank me (if it knows what's good for it).
Please wish me luck in harnessing the power of bloodyminded self-denial.
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On the third bus with only minor injuries (bruised knee - I'll be pathetic about it later). The local toerags are riding their bikes on and off the road, rear wheels only. They're too young to have donor cards, and The Parade is not an ideal location for such stupidity. I blame the parents. I mean, condoms are cheap. Sometimes thay're even free.
Beware of geeks being gits.
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Soup is now fully assembled. It just needs a long simmer to finish the job. Mixed feelings about this; I gave it a stir and pulled a muscle in my back. Life is peril.
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Despite my best efforts I'm only going to be 10 minutes later than usual at the shops. I did try to be a bit slower, I really did.
Craving pastry. Not craving effort. Have any of you eaten Aldi spanakopita and lived to tell the tale?
Etiquette and good manners aren't dead, but they can be seen coughing up blood in the corner.
https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/picture/2026/jul/17/rudeness-manners-whatever-happened-to-being-polite
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@futzle@old.mermaid.town I went with 'archaic', but that doesn't stop me using words if I feel like it.
This article, essentially a review of a review, has convinced me that I needn't make any effort to see the film.
https://www.theguardian.com/film/2026/jul/27/odyssey-translator-emily-wilson-attacks-nolan-blockbuster
Early morning. The first birds are outside, stumbling about and crashing into things in the dark. I am lying perfectly still. Suddenly, my left ankle makes grinding crunching noises. I wonder what that's about, other than a bid for attention. Skeletons are weird. Admittedly, exoskeletons are also weird.
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Windswept and cold at the bus stop. The things I do to avoid housework...
Midnight. Awake, apparently, and quite anxious about something. My brain won't specify what exactly. This is not helpful.
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@michaelgemar@cosocial.ca @bendaubney@social.lol @HeliosPi@neuromatch.social They're available as a sett.
A new achievement. I have hurt my shoulder while reading.
I find myself craving hot wet rice. As hot wet rice is an endurance event it's well beyond my current abilities. This is annoying.
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I have been elsewhere. That's enough of that. Not many people about, which was nice enough, though a bit of quality control would have helped. Heading home now with a view to rationalising not doing anything that should be done today.
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Waiting for the third bus. I'll have to come back here tomorrow. Ran out of arms.
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@ChrisMayLA6@mastodon.me.uk There's a reason Dante finds Ulysses in the Eighth Circle of Hell.
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The catch is, I'm in a junk food mood. Even at 7am. This won't be easy.
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Aldi has washing machines and dryers today, if that's your idea of an impulse buy. Also loads of DIY diabetes kits disguised as American delicacies. And bamboo underpants.
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@bgrinter@mastodon.sdf.org You're giving it that long? Generous.
@amyfallon@aus.social @NewtonMark@eigenmagic.net
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@matthew@fedi.acrossthecloud.net Sure. One of these days, and not actually coffee, but many other drinks are available.
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I was wrong. Tax took an entire three minutes to prepare and lodge.
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@matthew@fedi.acrossthecloud.net I need to go into town this morning, though I don't much want to. Still, that's hours away.
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If I buy junk food it might help me to work out how to handle a friend who's starting to exhibit bad opinions. Or it might not, but it would cheer me up for a few moments. Or would it?
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@matthew@fedi.acrossthecloud.net Only buses for me today. Train tomorrow - an outing to Blackwood. It's been a while.
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@matthew@fedi.acrossthecloud.net I like the area but need to be somewhere flat most days.
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Bored now (9:05am) - might as well have a nap.
Good news, unless you're a feral pig I guess.
https://www.abc.net.au/news/2026-06-25/kangaroo-island-free-of-feral-pigs-after-220-years/106789628