Hotter, even more cross Bunny

Eating crackers on my clean, fresh bedsheets like I'm fucking immortal or something.

What's that thing where you got a burning pain in the middle of your back that comes out through the front and you feel nauseous and your head hurts and you want to die? Because I think I have that. On top of my usual problems.

Starved of both food and affection. Someone should love me and bring me tacos.

Hello, and welcome to my home DIY influencer account where today I will transform this sink by cleaning it.

What are you looking for in a man? Oh, I'm not picky, I'll take...

RE: https://mastodon.social/@levelbot/116841842587142475 Let's everyone try n' raise the sausage.

There should be an award for putting just the right amount of milk on your cereal.

The television is trying to sell me a stuffed animal you can microwave and take to bed so it feels like someone loves you.

Them smurfs always got blue balls.

Please look at what is happening in the former dirt patch known as my Side Yard. I'm hoping to put a patio off to the right of this next year.

If your armpits smell like tacos but you haven't had tacos is that bad?

Not saying I'm up at 5 fucking thirty sitting on the toilet because a man attempted to "cook" ground chicken, but I'm not NOT saying it either.

Would something not need bowels to be disemboweled? #monsterdon

Post hot dog clarity (nachos)

Which one of you left your obs on my doorway? COME COLLECT YOUR ORRRBS, BABE. Alright, understand I used portrait mode on this annnnd, I was surprised that's what they looked like. That's not what I can see with my eyes.

BODI WAS AURORA BOREALIS. OR DAVID BOREANAZ. OR RICK MORANIS? LET'S MAKE SOLARBABIES ll !!!! #Monsterdon

And then the orb got 'em all hopped up on the cocaine. #Monsterdon

Holographic ants. Damn. The evil and powerful have all the good toys. #Monsterdon

@hannah@posts.rat.pictures I ripped my skull out just reading that.

What motherfuckin' day is it?

She was folksy, like a possum slow roasted on a spit.

@Binder@petrous.vislae.town (counting on fingers) (taking off shoes) WHAT THE HELL?!

My poop schedule is all fucked up now. I got a three hour car ride in a few days and MY POOP SCHEDULE IS OUTTA WACK.

You can take it to the bank! They ain't gonna let you deposit it, but no rules against takin' it there!

Who else had five good poops in the past 24 hours? Just me? (holding crown above my head for a moment, waiting for replies) 👑 #poopmaxxing

(severe Maurice Sendak voice) Innnn tha tirrre smelterrrr #monsterdon

Hello. I have heard a term I don't understand on the internet and I'm afraid to look it up.

@donni@mastodon.social You might be thinking of obstetrics.

@ThePJN@universeodon.com MORE LIKE PHPEE, AM I RIIIGHT?

@notanowl@social.brotherpsyche.social 🥹🐶

RE: https://mastodon.social/@levelbot/116950920479308283 Boys appearing in my yard, then vanishing and reappearing

Yeah. It won't go away either. I tapped it and it's just a regular ol' random reply. I don't understand.

Manhiclular vehiclecide. Tsk, tsk. #Monsterdon

Are they saying "personalarium"? #monsterdon

@ptoothfish@beige.party NOT IN FRONT OF THE CHILDREN!

@NickGates@friendsofdesoto.social 🥳

@Pinchy63@ottawa.place 🥹🐶

RE: https://mastodon.social/@levelbot/116955049261232969 Hamsters up to mid-thigh.

ABDUCTED!? THIS IS A CHILD ABDUCTION RING?! WITHOUT EVEN A DECENT SOUNDTRACK?! #Monsterdon

Great job, team! Let's some of us go fight vampires now! #monsterdon

Young man, that's vandalism! #monsterdon

Soooo...all these bad dudes have erectile dysfunction? #monsterdon

I'm a #monsterdon virgin, be gentle with me.

WHO RUNS TIRETOWN #monsterdon

Now THAT'S a flamin' hot manicure! #monsterdon

JESUS CHRIST! #Monsterdon

It's like Christmas goddamn morning!

@h3mmy@lgbtqia.space 🥹🐶

YELLOW ALERT!!! (somebody pissed themselves) #Monsterdon