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easy freak bakehouse

@triz@normal.style
mastodon 4.5.10
  • Open on normal.style

you know me, you love me. i'm real regular

"there's a specific sense of impending doom that comes from getting the triz fave" - wuff hexx

"triz... invented words" - sabrina

1524 Followers
186 Following
50 Posts
Joined September 12, 2024
pronouns:
she/her
monnouns:
queen/empress/imperatrix
Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 2w ago
Replying to
the mom was abjectly apologetic but like. i'm sorry if your kids are following someone around a restaurant dining room asking inappropriate questions, the honest answers to which could cause violence to be done to me depending on your politics, you need to instill a modicum of fucking discipline or take them home
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easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 2w ago
Replying to
let me please make this as explicitly clear as possible in case there are parents of young children on here: i don't honestly care how progressive you are or how montessori your philosophy on a child's rearing. a service worker does not know you nor do they owe your children an education as to their personal identity, particularly when that identity is marginalized, especially when you live in a place where that marginalized identity is more at risk than in other places
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easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 1mo ago
Replying to
SCORPIO: you have plenty of hoisin sauce SAGITTARIUS: paper towels is the thing you keep forgetting to add to the list CAPRICORN: get someone to help you check the indicator lights on your car. one of the bulbs is out
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easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 1mo ago
Replying to
AQUARIUS: don't throw out that usb 1.0 wall plug, you're going to have a thing that needs it
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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 2mo ago
Boosted by @GroupNebula563@mastodon.social
the criterion closet is the closet i stuff you in until you meet my criteria
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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 2mo ago
mitch mcconnell is recovering well at home. please don't investigate further. the a/c is on and he is eating his favourite leaves and small insects
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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 2mo ago
any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind. and therefore never send to know for whom the jerk store calls; they're all out of thee
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easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 2mo ago
holding a press conference to announce that i, triz, am closing the drake passage to all shipping. it's closed, and you can't have it, and also i am going to take a big cut of all the shipments that go through it, because it's closed. i am also going to force chile, argentina, and antarctica to open it, we're in peace talks, i just spoke with the president of antarctica, lovely man, very put together, central casting, always wears a tuxedo, but i'm going to win and the straits are closed. by me
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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 2mo ago
Replying to
like the red banners strung between the colonnades of hollowed out german institutions, the cultural memory that glorified an era about as far away from them as ward cleaver and ma and pa kettle are from us today, the uniforms made with forced labour to fit a despot's anxious ideas of masculinity more than any real wartime utility, it all must have seemed as sloppy and distasteful as an ai state fair on the national mall or the gold-sprayed flourishes krazy glued to the walls of the oval office
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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 5mo ago

finally got my pr card! i'm officially safe to remain here indefinitely!!!

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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 5mo ago

1. there exist both ryan adams (american) and bryan adams (canadian)
2. there also exists ryan reynolds (canadian)
3. this implies the existence of bryan breynolds (american)

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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 2mo ago
i don't want to hear a peep out of any of you about who the guy in the binface suit is or in what british comedian bog standard ways he may turn out to be problematic. this is like a camping hot dog, there's some things you just enjoy and don't question too much
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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 5mo ago

the thing is that as a society we should probably continually reevaluate the harms done by gatekeeping vs the value of expertise and the harms done by allowing amateurs to practice specialized pursuits. but "fuck it all to the ground let whoever do whatever guided by a talking wikipedia simulator and the power of friendship" is a fundamentally unserious attitude. you are a rube for elon and company, witting or no

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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 5mo ago
Replying to
either the box does not work and bob is a huckster, or alice is teaching the magic do-anything box how to make her widgets, which means anybody with the magic do-anything box can make her widgets and an alice can be cut out of the equation entirely in short order
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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 3mo ago
hell yeah i'm drinking bag-in-box margaritas out of a pink ombre glass that says BRUNCH SQUAD. keep scrollin
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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 5mo ago
Replying to
but if i tell you to instead input that data into the magic box to see what it thinks about it, and that data is somehow recalled later by someone else, i am somehow allowed to treat it like a bug in the system at worst, and a feature at best, that our beautiful tabula rasa has somehow through the sheer power of thinking a lot constructed, de novo, the very data you input in the first place
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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 5mo ago

😘

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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 4mo ago

it's one hard drive full of hentai, michael. how much can it cost, $100,000?

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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 5mo ago
Replying to
let's take it one step further. we have spoken before about how ai is a device for *laundering culpability* if i, acting as a business consultant, obtain the secret sauce of your business—be it recipes, customer databases, genetic research—and hand it over to your competitor, i am massively liable for breach of contract, intellectual property theft, etc. (cont'd)
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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 4mo ago

DOCTOR HARDMAN: spit it out, new guy, what do we have

DR. FLOPSWEAT LICKSPITTLE: elderly patient in her mid-30's presenting with acute chyron in her lower third. iv is thready, pulse is thoracic, and we've already given her 10 cc's of stat

HARDMAN (jaw set): give her. the good drug

ADMINISTRATOR PENNYWHISTLE: i thought i told you we can't afford good drug. give your patients bad drug or i'll hang your scrubs from the highest yardarm

HARDMAN: lickspittle, do it

PATIENT: wait i want bad drug

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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 5mo ago

having eight beers #🍁maxxing

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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 4mo ago

please do not conflate me with other patricias online, it could go very poorly for me

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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 4mo ago

studio exec: ok george, we have a senator character who runs on a progressive platform but then votes to put his constituents in chains and force them to build cooling towers for the ai megamind. what should we name him

george lucas: john fetters-man 😎

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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 4mo ago

my calais girlfriend, trained on $100,000 of imported sex arses,

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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 5mo ago
Replying to
technically she also brought me breakfast in bed
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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 5mo ago
Replying to
joke's on you: after listening to you argue, i have already depicted myself as deserving of a day at the cat cafe followed by enthusiastic head from several beautiful women
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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 5mo ago
Replying to
superman *can* go to the bathroom; you *may*
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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 4mo ago

"centre"-right parties love to get baited by their quiet-part-loud coalition partners into sticking their dick in a spinning blender. it keeps happening

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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 5mo ago

woke up feeling like a white female mamdani

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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 4mo ago

the thing is that dialectics are good, but they are also bad, and therefore perhaps also a secret third thing

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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 4mo ago

the question is what are they going to call the referendum? albexit? berxit perhaps?

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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 3mo ago
deeply fucked that there's no amtrak station in hamtramck
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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 5mo ago

i would like to take back all the times i said stuff like flying or invisibility to answer the question "what superpower would you have, if you could choose exactly one?"

instead i wish i could write a song with the same blend of nostalgia, yearning, hope and wistful despair as john k. samson

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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 5mo ago
Replying to
saw this dropped in a comments section about what seemed to me to be a pretty anodyne difference of interpretation and like. i do not have the patience for this kind of painfully earnest theatre teen energy
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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 5mo ago

me last wednesday: hello dr's office. i need to refill my prescription that has no refills left. do i need to make an appointment or

dr's office: no you go to the pharmacy and they fax us, are you stupid or something?

(i sumbit a refill request to the pharmacy)

pharmacy app today, may 6: we will review your request by may 2 :)

me: hey so uh

pharmacy: oh yeah your doctor never got back to us

(i call dr office)

dr office: we don't do refills by fax, you need an appointment. are you dumb?

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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 4mo ago

xanga? i hardly

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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 5mo ago
Replying to
superman goes over they're,
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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@LaComtesseRouge@egirls.gay i just meant it hadn't originally been conceived of as a mother's day thing
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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 4mo ago
Replying to
@LaComtesseRouge@egirls.gay sure are bb 💜💜
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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@dankwraith@monads.online :3
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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@jackdaw_ruiz@normal.style thank you jd, it's not something i would undertake for the sheer hell of it i'll say that much lmao
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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@willm the extra b is for byob
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Open post
easy freak bakehouse @triz@normal.style
· 5mo ago
Replying to
@DaveyJJJones@monads.online ty davey!!!
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