Percy 🐾 the human accused me of "not being as helpful as you think you are". And then she tried to move my paw out of the way to write, so I boeped her hand and made her write all over her notes
Poppy 🐾 my mugshot from when I was missing a year ago. Thankfully the human never gave up, putting up posters and handing out leaflets around the neighbourhood, until she eventually found me. It took 21 days and I lost a third of my pre-ordeal weight
Pebbles 🐾 Hi, I'd like to make a complaint. I woke my human up at 4.42am this morning*, way ahead of her 9am meeting, and I feel she didn't express adequate gratitude for my service
by enclosing her foot with my four paws and simultaneously sinking my teeth and claws into her soft skin
Poppy 🐾 bit disappointed in the human and how rarely I feature on this account. I mean, clearly I'm the prettiest of the chaos kittens and deserve all the attention.
Stupid excuse from the human too. Something about me never standing still. Pfft