Nick Mathewson

Well, it looks like we won't be using our back porch for a while

today i saw somebody use Latin rules to form the singular of a Japanese word ending with "-i" by replacing the "-i" with an "-um"

my brain still hurts, but i have to credit their audacity.

Ourobullshit, the serpent that cites its own tail

Hey baby, are you the Sieve of Eratosthenes? Because ever since I met you, I can't even

These mistletoe substitutes are well intentioned, but maybe they need a different name

As I count through my every neurosis
I can chalk up one third to osmosis.
For one third the credit
Can go to heredit-
y. One third is toxoplasmosis.

That Massachusetts feeling when you tell your out-of-state co-workers that you're taking the day off for the official state holiday, and then realize you need to specify that it's for Patriots' Day, not for the weed thing.

Have any countries tried publicly honoring the 100 top taxpayers? I feel like it could encourage the right sort of thing,

Etiquette books should include example letters about the politest way to tell somebody "I am forking your software, which appears to be unmaintained."

Wanted: a tool to take autocorrected text and reconstruct what you meant instead.

I have "Ukranian" on my to-do list I and I have no idea what I actually meant to do.

(Do not suggest your favorite LLM.)

Only one week till #bloomsday! It's time to reserve a gorgonzola sandwich at your local respectable pub, take your ashplant out of the closet, find a good local beach for people-watching, and just start getting generally #ineluctable.

"I've decided to quit doing sit-ups" said Tom in an act of self abnegation.

#TomSwifties #puns

"hey baby, do you want to be the emperor of China? Because id love to take you out on the man date of heaven"

Typo of the day: "...but not everybody is on boa."

Trying to remember details about a guy from an Icelandic saga and searched for "Hrapp". All that got me was HR apps :(

Finally finished reading Hailey Piper's _The Game In Yellow_, which has got to be the scariest work in the king-in-yellow mythos that I have ever read, and one of the very best horror novels I have read in a while.

You should probably find a set of CWs for the book before you read it, and avoid it completely if you are not sure that you like horror.

#KingInYellow #Horror

What's the matter, honey? You've barely touched your OC with TO garlic PUS sauce...!

Does anybody know of a big winter bonfire within driving distance of Boston?

"Hang on, Gandalf. Why would the inscription say 'Speak *Fried* And Enter'?"

"Ah! Right you are, Boromir. I suppose it's true that even the very wise.. cannot see all Ns."

#LordOfTheRings #Jokes #BadPuns

First, allowing parties to send unexpected ignored traffic opens side channels, so we must do something about it. And secondly, you must be Jon Postel for his Law to apply, and you're not. And thirdly, Postel's Law is more what you'd call "guidelines" than actual rules.

Why do they call them "field rations" when the phrase "camo meals" is available? #BadPuns

"They keep trying to treat me like some kind of Ottoman dignitary! Fortunately, I'm not so easily effendied."

#BadPuns